The 4 Must Haves Former Athletes Need To Find Happiness After Sports
Us former athletes really had a unique experience growing up, didn’t we? No matter what season of life we were in, our sport was always there for us.
Think about it: It almost didn’t matter what was going on with our grades, our friends, or home life - with sports, we always had a place to escape. A place where we were praised for our performance. Validated by our victories. Tied together with our teammates.
But now that it’s all over, does anyone else feel a little bit… lost? Don’t worry - you’re not alone!
Life after sports can scary
A lot of former athletes start to feel like they’ve lost themselves once they hang up their sports equipment. I know, because I felt that way, too. Once we stop playing sports, we lose a routine that has been with us throughout our entire athletic career. There are no more two-hour practices. No more forced 2-mile runs at the track. No more coaches or teammates cheering you on.
After I quit playing soccer and running track competitively, I struggled with this drastic lifestyle change. I clung to cardio and severe calorie restriction because I thought they would bring back the old, athletic version of me. It wasn’t long before I didn’t know who I was anymore.
How to feel like yourself again (as a former athlete)
If you’re wondering who you are now that your competitive athletic career is over, you’re in the right place! The truth is, it’s never too late to find yourself after sports, so why not start now?
Starting is always the hardest part of anything, so I want to give you something specific to focus on.
Here are four things I want you to do that will help you start feeling like yourself again so you can love your life post-sports.
Pro tip: Write down your thoughts in each area as you go through this post to start brainstorming exactly what you’re ideal life post-sports looks like!
1.find other things you enjoy doing
The first thing I want you to do is find other things you enjoy doing… and do them!
This involves exploring who you really are, who you want to be, and who you have always been without sports.
This probably sounds a little (a lot) overwhelming, but really what I’m asking you to do is to spend time finding things that you enjoy doing that don’t involve your sport(s).
Think Back to Move Forward
If you don’t know where to start, think back to the days before you were an athlete. Did you ever find yourself making time for other activities? Maybe you liked to draw or paint. Maybe you were someone who spent their evenings tucked away with a good book. Maybe you even played an instrument?
As we get older, we forget to make time for the things that bring us joy. The things that don’t bring us physical rewards. This is especially true for women.
You might have to think back to when things were simpler to help you explore who you are and what you like as an adult. That’s OK! You’re not going backwards - you’re going back to your roots.
This can be a bit of a process, so please be patient with yourself as you learn more about your likes and grow into the person you’re meant to be. Ask yourself what would you do if you could do anything right now? If your mind immediately goes to sports, exercise, or movement, acknowledge those thoughts, but save them for the next step.
2. try new forms of movement
Once you find a few things you enjoy doing besides sports, the next step to finding yourself is trying new forms of movement that don’t feel like exercise. Even though exercise is great for us, we can only start to find ourselves when we don’t make it the main goal.
I know what you’re thinking: Exercise gives us endorphins. Endorphins make us happy. Why shouldn’t we just focus on working out?
I’m sorry girls, but Elle Woods WAS NOT a former athlete!
Like I mentioned briefly before, the responsibilities of adulthood often lead us former athletes to spend our time only on activities we deem necessary: Work, exercise, grocery shopping, etc. Being Type A served us really well as athletes, but we need to be able to find the fun and joy in movement - not just work towards a goal. That’s the key to feeling like ourselves again.
Types of movement that don’t feel like exercise
You’re probably thinking “Ok Liv - What type of movement are you talking about?” I’m talking about literally anything that doesn’t feel like exercise! So forget running, weight lifting, pilates classes, etc. When do those activities, we are already categorizing them as workout’s, right? This leads a lot of former athletes to think about how many calories they can burn, how fast they can run, and how much they can sweat. Let’s get out of those negative thought-patterns and try movement that serves us mentally.
A great idea is to move your body in nature. What does this look like for me? I love to snowboard! There is something almost magical about gliding down the mountain… for me! It’s not the perfect form of movement for everyone, and that’s OK!
A lot of the women I work with love to get into the woods for a nice hike or walk. I’ll say it again - we are NOT just doing these things to “workout!” It’s about how these types of movements make us feel.
You can get moving indoors, too!
I know that getting outside isn’t always easy - especially in the winter - so of course I have some types of movement you can try indoors!
Dancing is one of the simplest ways to move that will help you feel like yourself again. Put on your favorite song and just let everything go! Afraid your dog might judge your dance moves? Set a timer and walk around your house instead. Even if it’s just for five minutes at a time or during the commercial breaks of The Bachelor.
If nothing I’ve mentioned sounds like it’s for you yet, you can always trying cleaning. It sounds crazy, I know, but housework is a great way to get your body moving. Plus there’s the added bonus of a nice, clean space.
3. focus on your career
The third big thing you can do as a former athlete to feel like yourself again is to focus on your career. When I saw focus, I don’t mean work 12+ hour days, sacrifice the things you love, and answer work emails on the weekend. That doesn’t sound like fun.
I mean take some time to focus on every little piece of your career. Ask yourself:
Do I feel fulfilled?
Am I seeking out meaningful work in my day-to-day?
Can I see myself further along in my career path? Am I happy?
Do my coworkers/managers/salary/benefits make me feel appreciated?
Did you answer no to some of these questions? If so, why are you still where you are?
I think it’s hard for some of us to realize this, but you haven’t peaked. The best years of your life are still ahead of you, even though you’re done playing competitive sports. While they shouldn’t be everything to us, our careers are an important part of our lives that directly impact that way we feel about our identities. If we’re unhappy with our careers, it’s hard to find happiness in other parts of our lives.
One of the most important things I do with all of my coaching clients is sit down and assess what areas of their lives could use some focus and we do some good old fashioned goal-setting. Believe it or not, the career area is one of the most common places former athletes want to make improvements in. You wouldn’t settle playing a sport you didn’t love, right? Don’t settle on your career, either.
feed the right friendships
The last and possibly most important thing you can do as a former athlete to find yourself again is to feed the right friendships. One of the things I miss most about soccer is my team!
Having a supportive, like-minded community is one of those things I think we all took for granted in sports, but now that we’re adults, we find it hard to replicate that feeling in our work or friend groups. This is especially true when one of our goals is health and fitness.
Let’s face it: Not every one of our friends values the same things. And you know just as well as I do that life can be insanely busy. But taking care of yourself - mentally and physically - is something I think all women should value… no matter their athletic background.
Now I’m not saying cut out your friends who have different values than you, but start trying to seek out and surround yourself more with people who are looking to level up in life and take care of themselves both mentally and physically. Why? It’ll give you a better chance to reach your goals.
This isn’t a new idea. Actually, one of my favorite writers and speakers, James Clear, talks about this concept specifically in this book “Atomic Habits.”
““Most of the time, the desire to belong will overpower the desire to improve. So as best as possible, you’ve got to get those two things aligned and surround yourself with people where your desired behavior is the normal behavior.””
So remember to feed the friendships that will help you reach your goals!
Take the first step
Finding happiness and fulfillment in your life after sports as a former athlete isn’t as easy. There are a lot of “quick fixes” out there that do anything but fix the complex root of the problem.
Change isn’t easy.
Building habit systems, wellness routines, and mindsets that serve you requires a strong commitment to yourself. But if. you’re here and you’ve made it to the end of the post, you’re in the right spot!
This post should give you a great jumping off point for you to find happiness after sports. Even if just one or two of the points stuck with you, that’s somewhere for you to start. And somewhere to start is better than staying where you are, don’t you think?
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